Links:
Books I read recently:
Books my husband just gave me for my birthday and so I intend to read:
I was telling Jill this past week if you find yourself drawn to reading about the Holocaust and want to read something perhaps a bit more uplifting or at least great literature, read anything by Aharon Appelfeld.
One of my hobbies is, while I am driving around this bitty borough of ours, to note political lawn signs. During local elections, many lawns here have signs. Over the past few weeks, I’ve noted the national election lawn signs going up. My block now has one Obama sign and two Hillary signs.
A few weeks ago I saw one Hillary Clinton sign and several Obama signs in all of Highland Park. As of this past weekend, however, that changed: now there are quite a few of both. On Sunday, our mayor, Meryl Frank, held a meeting with Senator Robert Menendez called: “Hillary Clinton:the best choice from a Jewish Perspective” (which I would have liked to attend, but life with three kids makes such things difficult). So Meryl is publicly supporting Hillary.
We don’t do signs on our lawn. I once put a political sign on our lawn for a local election. My husband and I decided we were not doing that again. For one, we like our neighbors, no matter how they may vote. And for two, I got an unpleasant phone call as the result of putting up the sign.
I have not seen any political lawns signs on any of the Orthodox Jewish homes here. (No, I take that back…I did see one Hillary sign.)
No Republican signs. I do know of at least one Highland Parker who is planning to cast his vote for McCain.
The signs merely reflect the most vocal people here in our borough. Someone once said: “just because a person is the loudest in the room does not mean that he/she is right.”
What does your neighborhood look like?
What to do with stale bread? Or bread that is about to go stale and getting hard? I recycle my homemade bread into croutons. If you have no homemade bread lying around, use the best quality bakery bread you can get.
Ingredients:
- Almost stale bread
- Olive oil
- One garlic clove, peeled and cut in half
- Sea Salt, to taste
- Oregano, to taste
Cut your almost stale bread into cubes. Put it on a plate on the counter to dry out for a day or two. Take a ceramic baking dish or a cookie sheet. Rub each bread cube with the garlic. Coat the bread cubes with a layer of olive oil. Sprinkle with sea salt and oregano (or your favorite dried herb). Throw in the remainder of the garlic, and bake for about 20-30 minutes.
Even my kids like these. Maybe you could eat them while watching the Super Bowl?
From the Jewish State (local Central New Jersey newspaper):
According to a statement issued by Prosecutor Bruce Kaplan’s office the teens’ “alcohol-fueled vandalism” came from teenage boredom, not anti-Semitism. Kaplan said this means while the teens will still face vandalism charges in Family Court, they will not be prosecuted on the more serious charge of committing a hate crime.
and, on the civil suit filed against the teens:
The cost of reconstruction is currently estimated to be between $500,000 and $1 million. While adjudication of a juvenile is not a matter of public record, [Attorney Gerald] Gordon said, punitive-damage civil judgements remain in effect until they are paid. This would make it difficult, if not impossible, for the teens to get credit cards as adults and also damage their future credit reports.
Children need to learn at a young age to respect other people’s property. I believe Rabbi Bassous mentioned this in his speech on the cemetery desecration, but I will retell in my own words here:
The story in the Gemara (thank you to Olomeinu, a children’s magazine) is Mar Zutra’s goblet was stolen. He saw a man wiping his hands on someone else’s garment without permission. He then knew that that was the thief, for he saw that this man had no respect for the possessions of others (Bava Metzia 24a).
UPDATE: On the Main Line has the Olemeinu cartoon along with analysis of such cartoons. If you don’t take Olemeinu too seriously, it’s humorous.
We certainly can’t control how others raise their children. It seems like the best we can do is make it difficult for non-respecting people to get credit cards.
My mother, z”l (zichrona l’bracha, may her memory be a blessing), called it ‘the Big C.’ She couldn’t say its real name, Cancer. That would be too much of an admission of its arrival, of the arrival of this dreaded, unwelcome guest. My mother was diagnosed with colon cancer soon after my wedding. The early years of my marriage and of my sons’ babyhoods were marked by worry about how was she doing, how much longer would she be with us, could we do anything at all to reverse the decree, as it felt to us. The doctor gave her less than two years to live; she lived for more than five. Part of her longer survival might have been due to the force of the chemotherapy. My father’s care for her helped, too. A large part was her own desire to live just a bit longer, to see a few more grandchildren born, to dance at a few more simchas.
Unfortunately, I have been impacted by cancer much of my life. In 4th grade, a dear boy in my class died of this disease. Would I get a lump on my leg, too? I used to think. Every ache and pain for the next few years scared me. There was a little girl whose family had come all the way from Israel to the Boston area so she could be treated for cancer. The little girl lived a few more years, but then she too succumbed. As the years rolled passed, I learned of adults who had died of cancer. A friend’s aunt. A friend’s father. An aunt in Israel.
In my twenties, a friend’s mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. I remember how warm a woman she was. I loved going to her home on Shabbat, the table spread with delicacies, and her warm smile making me feel welcome. Once, I went with my friend and her family on a hike in Maine. Out in the woods, we cooked hot dogs over an open fire. I remember her mother said: “I never ate these before I was diagnosed. I always avoided food like this (hot dogs). But now, what does it matter.” What a sad, sad day it was when we attended her funeral.
Years later, my friend would blame fat. “My mother made everything with fat, fat, fat,” she would say. What kind of fat wasn’t clear. One can only guess (saturated animal fat at the main course, with hydrogenated fat for dessert? With some rancid, overcooked oils thrown in anywhere?) Her father, too, would be stricken; about a year or two before my mother died, her father died of prostate cancer.
How I got stuck on the cancer and nutrition link and continue to follow this issue is a subject for another post. I can only write so much on this topic without feeling emotionally drained.
But I will say this: remember how my friend’s mother never ate hot dogs before she got sick? I gradually came to the opposite conclusion. Giving up hot dogs wasn’t merely enough. The food pyramid that we are taught about nutrition isn’t enough. There’s a lot to know about nutrition, and all our bodies are different.
In memory of my dear mother, here are some of her paintings.
When I first blogged about the cemetery vandalism in New Brunswick, I wrote Are we in Eastern Europe? I am pleased to say we are not. What is the difference? Here in Central New Jersey, not only is the Jewish community reacting with shock to the recent vandalism, but there is also condemnation from the general community.
From today’s Daily Targum, the Rutgers student newspaper:
“It is one of the most dramatic events you [can] see in a physical sense,” said Rutgers University Student Assembly treasurer Yonaton Yares, a School of Arts and Sciences student.
RUSA unanimously passed a resolution Thursday to get students involved in the site’s repair.
Members of the assembly said such a resolution was necessary in order to make a statement on behalf of the student body that such acts are unacceptable.
“[The resolution] shows that Rutgers University doesn’t tolerate that kind of crime, because we don’t want to destroy our diversity,” said College Avenue Council Vice President Yelena Shvarts, a Rutgers College junior.
The key to preventing such acts from occurring in the future is to become opinionated, said RUSA recording secretary Kathryn Jenkins, a Douglass College student.
Yares said this incident has brought together members of Rutgers Hillel.
“We have decided to say that Rutgers students – Jewish, non-Jewish, black, white or Latino – all care about this,” he said.
RUSA hopes the assembly can generate the same solidarity among students that the University community demonstrated during the Don Imus controversy last year to prevent future acts from occurring.
“When someone goes on the radio and attacks our women’s basketball team, they don’t just attack those women. They attack the entire Rutgers community,” said RUSA chair Jim Kline, a Rutgers College senior. “The same goes when you attack the Rutgers community and what it stands for.”
Surveyors are beginning to assess the damage done to the site in an attempt to estimate the amount that repairs will cost.
A week after the incident, four teenagers were arrested and charged for committing the vandalism, though the acts were not deemed anti-Semitic by authorities, according to The Associated Press.
But Kline said the acts are upsetting to the Jewish community.
“I think our voice as the student body lends an olive branch to the Jewish community. It allows students to enter into this dialogue about racism, sexism and, in this case, anti-Semitism,” Kline said. “It’s important to have these conversations now that we live in this bubble where we can openly discuss ideas and thoughts.”
Somehow I think there is a connection to the film I viewed by a Franklin Township student yesterday. Sonal Thawani’s film “Take a Stand Against Violence,” a 6-minute piece showed the positive action taken by her community’s youth in response to the recent violence in her township. It was heartening to see in Sonal’s film that many people in her community wanted to see a stop to the violence. Likewise, we all would like cemetery desecration to stop as well.
My main thought is it is easier to teach a five-year old to respect property, respect the dead, and respect others than a 17 year old. And as both cemetery desecration and violence against one’s peers reflect poor anger management, some kind of positive channeling is needed at a young age. I hardly profess to have answers, but I am good at asking the questions.
From nj.com:
Accused vandals sued over Jewish cemetery destruction
A Rutherford resident whose parents’ gravestones were desecrated in a New Brunswick Jewish cemetery this month has filed a lawsuit against the four teenagers charged with causing the damage to nearly 500 headstones.
Mark Elfant is a member of Congregation Poile Zedek with familial ties to the congregation dating to the 1800s. Gerald Gordon, Elfant’s lawyer, said he is seeking monetary damages from the accused teenagers, their parents and anyone else involved. Damage has been estimated between $500,000 to $1 million.
“We’re not going to let them off the hook,” said Gordon, whose mother ran the cemetery for 30 years and who is handling the case pro bono. “The money we get will go to a fund for the restoration, security and perpetual care of the cemetery.”
Elfant’s mother, Ann Elfant, cared for the cemetery for five decades. His father, Morris Elfant, played a key role in creating the cemetery association. And his grandfather, Benjamin Elfant, was a founder of the congregation in the late 1800s.
Caryn Lipson, administrator at Congregation Poile Zedek, declined to comment.
“He is acting as a private citizen,” Lipson said. “This has nothing to do with the congregation.”
The commenters to the article all want to see something done. The idea that a 17 year old can commit such an act and walk away scot-free is bizarre.
Much thanks to Batya for organizing this carnival. And including links to two of my posts! My first posts on a carnival! (I didn’t know what a carnival was before this, but it’s a very fun way to find out about other bloggers).
We have a new borough council member in Highland Park: Padraic Millet. Padraic says he is stepping up to do his civic duty. Best wishes to you in this endeavor.
Story from Home News Tribune:
By TOM CAIAZZA
STAFF WRITER
HIGHLAND PARK — The Borough Council appointed a new member to replace departing council member Fern Goodhart on the same night Mayor Meryl Frank was sworn in for an unprecedented third term.
Padraic Millet, a committee member for borough Democrats who is a facilities administrator for Rutgers University, was sworn in as councilman during Monday’s council reorganization meeting. Millet, 49, was chosen over two other candidates selected by the Democratic Committee as possible replacements for Goodhart.
Millet, a borough resident for 14 years, has several years’ experience serving on the Zoning Board and the Democratic Committee. He said civic duty was his reason for standing as a candidate.
“Now I’m stepping up to do my part,” he said.
Millet, who will use his construction background to head up the borough’s Code Enforcement Committee, said his desire to be a councilman is simple.
“I live on a quiet, dead-end street on the south side of town,” he said.
“It’s worth working to keep.”
As she begins her third term as mayor, Frank views her November election as a confirmation that the public approves of the groundwork set over the last eight years.
“I think the message was loud and clear,” Frank said, “that the people like the way the community is going, and they want to continue it.”
She said the third term may not consist of the sweeping policies that have defined her first two terms in office but will involve efforts to ensure that work continues.
“This third term is a confirmation that we are on the right track,” she said.
Millet replaced Goodhart, the winner of an uncontested re-election bid in November. She resigned to take a year-long fellowship in Washington, D.C., with the American Health Association. Goodhart plans to move to the Washington, D.C., area for the year and will be unable to conduct her duties as councilwoman.
…and then it all turned to rain.
